Couples | Parejas

Human being are hardwired for connection | Los seres humanos estamos diseñados para tener conexión con otros

Falling in love is the easy,  staying in love is the hard part.

Did you know that on average, when couples feel something is not right in the relationship they wait around 6 years before they seek help?

Couples counselling is firstly, about learning how to communicate and receive communication better. how navigate conflicts (yes, conflicts are inevitable). Additionally, we explore emotional injuries and correspondingly we learn the other side of the story. Basically, it is about learning to listen to understand, not to respond.

Enamorarse es fácil, mantenerse enamorado es lo que es difícil

¿Sabia usted de como promedio, cuando las parejas sienten que hay algo que no esta funcionando en la relación, esperan como promedio 6 años antes de buscar ayuda? 

La terapia de pareja sirve para aprender a comunicarse, a navegar conflictos (si, los conflictos son inevitables en las relaciones). Es para explorar las heridas emocionales sufridas por ambos y para aprender el otro lado de la historia. Básicamente, es para aprender a escuchar para entender y no para responder

Gottman Method for Couples

How is your relationship? I you looking to strengthen your relationship or understand the dynamics between you and your partner better, The Gottman Method for Couples is a research-based therapeutic approach developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, renowned psychologists in the field of marriage and relationships.

What is is?
The Gottman is one of the most popular methods used in couple’s therapy. With over 35 years of research, John, Julie and the Gottman Institute have studied thousands of couples, families and their dynamics. The interventions they have created are the result of those studies and they are based on 7 main principles and two pillars, commitment and trust.

Components
At the core of the Gottman Method is the “Sound Relationship House” theory, which outlines the key elements necessary for a healthy and lasting relationship. These components include, firstly,  building love maps, sharing fondness and admiration, turning towards each other instead of away, managing conflict, making life dreams come true, creating shared meaning, and maintaining a positive perspective. Furthermore, the method identifies four toxic communication patterns known as the “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse” – criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Recognizing and addressing these patterns and replacing them with their antidotes can significantly improve communication and conflict resolution in a relationship.
Unquestionably, the interventions are very effective when working with most of the issues that bring couples to therapy, issues such as communication issues, infidelity, trauma, disconnection, and much more. However, it also helps healthy couples strengthen their relationship, increase intimacy and feel closer.

Therapists that work with the Gottman method, generally use a specific plan. They start with a meeting with both partners, which is followed by an individual meeting with each of them. The goal is to gather as much information as possible from a neutral perspective. The third meeting (and all the following) are again with both partners and it serves to set the course of therapy.

Método Gottman para parejas

¿Cómo está tu relación? ¿Estás buscando fortalecer tu relación o comprender mejor la dinámica entre tú y tu pareja? El Método Gottman para Parejas es un enfoque terapéutico basado en la investigación desarrollada por los doctores John y Julie Gottman, psicólogos de renombre en el campo del matrimonio y las relaciones.

¿Qué es?
El Método Gottman es uno de los métodos más populares utilizados en la terapia de parejas. Con más de 35 años de investigación, John, Julie y el Instituto Gottman han estudiado a miles de parejas, familias y sus dinámicas. Las intervenciones que han creado son el resultado de esos estudios y se basan en 7 principios principales y dos pilares, el compromiso y la confianza.

Componentes
En el centro del Método Gottman se encuentra la teoría de la “Casa de la Relación Sana”, que describe los elementos claves necesarios para una relación saludable y duradera. Estos componentes incluyen construir mapas del amor, compartir afecto y admiración, dirigirse el uno al otro en lugar de alejarse, manejar conflictos, hacer realidad los sueños de vida, crear significado compartido y mantener una perspectiva positiva. El método identifica cuatro patrones tóxicos de comunicación conocidos como los “Cuatro Jinetes del Apocalipsis”: crítica, desprecio, defensividad y bloqueo emocional. Reconocer y abordar estos patrones y reemplazarlos con sus antídotos puede mejorar significativamente la comunicación y la resolución de conflictos en una relación.
Son muy efectivos al trabajar con la mayoría de los problemas que llevan a las parejas a la terapia, como problemas de comunicación, infidelidad, trauma, desconexión y mucho más. Pero también funciona para ayudar a las parejas saludables a fortalecer su relación, aumentar la intimidad y acercarse más.
Los terapeutas que trabajan con el método Gottman generalmente siguen un plan específico. Comienzan con una reunión con ambos socios, seguida de una reunión individual con cada uno de ellos. El objetivo es recopilar la mayor cantidad de información posible desde una perspectiva neutral. La tercera reunión (y todas las siguientes) es nuevamente con ambos socios y sirve para establecer el curso de la terapia.

Emotionally Focused Therapy | Attachment Patterns

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a therapeutic approach that centers on understanding and transforming the emotional bonds within relationships. Developed by Dr. Sue Johnson, EFT is rooted in attachment theory, a psychological framework that explores the impact of early attachment experiences on adult relationships.

Attachment patterns, shaped by early interactions with caregivers, play a crucial role in EFT. There are four primary attachment patterns: secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant.

  1. Secure Attachment: Individuals with a secure attachment style are comfortable with intimacy and are able to both give and receive support. They trust their partners and have a positive view of themselves and their relationships.
  2. Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment: Those with this style seek high levels of intimacy, approval, and responsiveness from their partners. They often worry about the stability of the relationship and fear rejection or abandonment.
  3. Dismissive-Avoidant Attachment: Individuals with this style tend to be self-reliant and avoid getting too close to others. They may downplay the importance of emotional connections and prioritize independence.
  4. Fearful-Avoidant Attachment: Also known as disorganized attachment, individuals with this style may have conflicting desires for closeness and independence. They often struggle with trust and may fear both rejection and engulfment.

EFT aims to identify and reshape these attachment patterns by helping couples recognize and express their emotional needs. The therapist assists partners in creating a secure emotional bond, fostering a sense of safety and connection within the relationship.

Through a series of structured conversations, EFT guides couples in understanding their emotions, breaking negative interaction cycles, and building a more secure attachment. This therapeutic approach has been shown to be effective in addressing a variety of relationship issues, from communication breakdowns to trust issues.

In summary, Emotionally Focused Therapy provides a roadmap for couples to navigate their emotional landscapes and cultivate secure attachments. By recognizing and addressing attachment styles, individuals can break free from negative patterns, fostering healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

Beyond the Nail

Blog

It's Not About the Nail

Sometimes couples’ arguments are not about what they seem to be.
Read More

Mas alla de lo visible

Blog

Mas alla de lo visible

A veces las peleas de la pareja no son por las causas mas obvias
Lea mas